Latte art, rosette <3

It look nice, isn't it. Yeap, it's my first time drawing an awesome latte art. For the first time! I always failed, and now I SUCCEED. And it is enough to make me HAPPY the whole day. 

Nice isn't it. :D

Beside making this awesome art, I got a chance to meet this gentleman, Issac from China, a developer of Android. DEVELOPER OF ANDROID! OMG! An honor man.

Another thing that made me happier, I FUCKING COMPLETED THE WHOLE NYAA THINGS. DONE WITH REPORT AND EVERYTHING. And Ms Kim is going to help me summit at the NYAA council. And everything was made possible thanks to Ms Kim. Sometimes, I feel sorry for going down to DSD almost every week to trouble her. And I really thank her for all her trouble. Thank you Ms Kim, Mr Kwok, Mr Helmi and all the DSD staff. Everything was possible thanks to you guys. With SP, it's so possible.  :D

And am I thinking too much sometimes? I feel like I am bugging my friends. It's like once I sees them as my close friends, yours sincerely tend to talk to them a lot. And sometimes, they wouldn't reply my messages. And it made me feel sad, lost hope, and troubled. I hate to lost my friends. Friendship is my weakest point.

" If friendship is your weakest point then you are the strongest person in the world.- Abraham Lincoln."

I hope it's true. :(

Le sigh. There goes my mood.

Literally gave up on doing presentation slides for CI. Found this charming music while browsing net. Like Finally.



It is almost magical. Soothing. Tranquil. Mind blowing.

And I used to listen to this song during duties at airport. Never failed to listen once. The song kept repeating but I never get bored of this. I felt different (peaceful, calm) and confident in serving the passengers while listening to this song. I miss that kind of feeling. One of the best moments of life.

How I wish I would still be in airport serving the passengers, while listening to this amazing music.

Happy Chinese New Year everyone; friends, families and people whom I met along the journey.

Torn Between Choices

There's gonna be Oversea Immersion Programme at Suzhou University in China, from September to January 2013. A five months long programme. Although costly, my mom encouraged me to apply for the programme. A HUGE SHOCK. 

Usually she would be against oversea trips and would nagged at me for hours before allowing me to go. But this time round, she even asking me to sign up for it without hesitation. She will even pay for my whole expenses. Shocking isn't it.

But, going to China isn't as easy as ABC. A lot of sacrifices have to be made, choices have to be chosen carefully. 

NYAA award ceremony takes place in October, so I can't attend the ceremony. Say, if I can take it next year with my friends, it would be good as well. But, I hate delaying, I want to get this thing done and over with.

And bye bye Myanmar for I have to undergo ITP in March Holidays. 

And bye to Daiko Concert if I were to go China. More damages to already ruined image in Daiko. I wonder what those seniors will think of me? Le sigh, more politics.

More things are waiting to be sacrificed. Bye to another round of Operation Shangri-La as well (if there is still one next year)

I am torn, between choices. Wishing that a miracle will happen. Cuz, I am rather a greedy type of person who want to grab hold of all given opportunities.

Sigh.

Don't forget where we came from

A few days before, mom gave me a firm lecture. Short but effective. "Don't forget where you came from, don't forget your origin".

The words struck me like an arrow. For a moment, I was overwhelmed by guilt. Yes, I did forget about my origin. I forgot I was a proud Myanmar. As I lived in Singapore, I was influenced by Singapore's culture that I forgot about my exquisite culture.  

Living in Singapore for 6 years made me forgot who I really was. I felt awkward starting a conversation with a Burmese after a few years, shunning them if possible. I felt that the Burmese people in Singapore are obnoxious without realizing that I am in fact obnoxious as well. I been committing a huge mistake without realizing until my mom pointed it out.

And as I found many other things that I have been missing. Thanks to Cultural Intelligence project, I began to take pride in myself as a Burmese. We have unfold treasures, rich in natural resources and more. Damn the government. Well, they are trying their best now. Who knows in future, Myanmar will become the richest country in future again, and becoming a tourist spot, more airlines coming in, Myanmar Airways will flourish (please get more planes, Boeing 747, A330, A340, etc). Can't wait.

Oh yea, I miss U Bein's Bridge. At the length of 1.2 km, it is in fact the longest yet oldest wooden bridge made of woods. Pure woods, teaks. I miss the shaky bridge and the scary yet exciting feeling when walking along the bridge. I can't wait to take a photo at U Bein's bridge (a sunset will be nice there). Well, I just can't wait to go back Myanmar.

the famous U Bein's Bridge

Myanmar, I'm coming home. :)

Leaving an old job.

It has been decided. I am resigning from Ambush end of this month. Reasons? Simple. Exams are coming up in February and loads of projects are waiting to be done. 

I need more times, in order to do well for my exams and projects, I have to scarify my work. I need to commit more to my school works now. And other reason, the manager, the new manager after Wendy leave Ambush is being a total bitch. Fucked up bitch I tell you bro. Come on, over 30 years old but still act like a child. Have you ever seen a married woman with a child flirting like a prostitute? Well, you will see one when you come to eat at Ambush. 

Sigh, she never understands how other would feel, she just verbally attacks people as and when she likes it. She does hold grudges uh. Fuck you bitch, a fucking pet of bosses. You have zero capability. Other can do even better than you man. Imagine how will you feel if others treat you and ignore you like you are invisible. I can't wait for the day to come, there is KARMA. Let's see how you will feel when your child is being treated like that. Evil much, ain't I?

You are the reason why I want to quit this place. The working life at Ambush has been so fun until you came in. You suck man, you seriously do. Why not just quit the job and go back to your country. You brought disgrace, shame and utter disappointment to your country.  

Ok, I went too far on attacking you personally. But you were so mean to me to the extent that I can only vent my anger and shoot you through a 12 messages long SMS, hoping that you would have a change of mind. But hell, I was wrong. She is more bitchier than ever.

After I quit Ambush, I can finally spare sometimes for myself, projects and I can at least have some spare times for Daiko. I have previously "quit" Daiko, for a while due to too many commitments. Sigh, I just can't bear to leave Daiko, why am I so friends oriented?

Sigh~

I understand how you feel, do you really do?

I guess you might have seen the previous post. Although I said a million times of I don't care about you anymore, as a matter of fact, I still do care. I still can't let go a friend, it's hard after all. But what is done can't be undone. Friendship ruined? Friendship even better than before? I am uncertain.

Let's talk about something else. A few days ago, our Psychology in Negotiation and Conflict Management lecturer told us a story about how the words "I understand how you feel" could get things more sophisticated  instead of solving the problems. Although I wanted to share the story the lecturer shared, I have to forgo the out of respect for privacy of the parties involved.

Well, we all including myself really love to use "I totally understand how you feel", or "I feel you" etc. In fact, we did not understand how they feel at all. We did not know what is going on around the people. They may lose their love one the night before, hurt, heart broken, depress, we might not know.

Thus they turned to us for comfort. In order to comfort them, we would say "I understand how you feel, I can understand, I feel you". In fact, we did not understand them more than they do.

Some may get offended while some may feel better. But most of the time, the conversation ended shortly after we said "I feel you".

Why? The conversation stopped because the other party think that we don't totally understand how they feel at all, thus coming to a conclusion that no point continuing the chat since we did not understand their feel.

Don't you find it, true? I too came to a realization that I often use these words. And now that I think about it, I said the words just to comfort them, but, did not feel their pain. Come to think of it, I used those words for granted, and, I felt guilty, real full of guilt after what the lecturer shared the story about "I understand how you feel".

Instead of saying how you feel them, why not give them a good, tight hug that give them the comfort that they need? Or lending them a shoulder to cry on, or rephrasing the words properly so that you don't "understand their feel" but know how they feel, try to be in their shoes for a moment, share their burden, feel how they feel. Thus yours truly believe that it doing so, it will lead to even better conversation with them, make them feel better.

For now, I dare not use the words, "I understand how you feel" anymore.

Friends, and, letting them go from your life

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us." Helen Keller 

Helen Keller, you know who is she, don't you? Yes, she was the great heroine who fought unimaginable challenges hurled at her by life and survived till old age. 

I could agree no more. What she said was totally true. We were so dwelling in the past that we bypass golden opportunities that have been awaiting us.

As for me, I was still believing in someone that I would still be treasured as a friend. And I held on, believing that I would be the friend that he can rely on, the one that would be there for him. But it seems like I am an extra. I wonder did I even get treated as a best friend even though I treated him like one, worship him like a god.  The most simplest way to depict how I feel right now;

Yeah, that's how I feel right now. And that is how I think of you now, pushing your friends to the corner totally forgetting about them when you have a girlfriend. Never took an initiate to ask if your friends were alright even if they are down and sad. Ignoring the friends that always approached you, trying to cheer you up. Am I right, bro? I am sorry if you think this is not the case but you can't blame me for thinking this way. I am a man of conclusions, I sure love to make judgement too, just like how you judged other people.

Just had an talk with a friend, and yeah, she was true. We were always under appreciated, all our efforts were never felt appreciated. It is never paid to put some people before selves, especially those who don't appreciate others. 

Letting go sounds sure easy. But it is hard and hurting. Letting go of someone whom you cared so much (sounds gay much) is not as easy as snapping one's finger. But I too, being a human, be self-centered asshole and should start to erase, parts by parts. That is only the most humane way to do so. Good for both sides, even though I still wishing that we could still maintain the kind of friendship we shared before she started coming into your life. Well, what is the point still holding on and torturing myself with wrong conclusions which ended up growing hatred for you.

Let's get back to Helen Keller's wisdom words, I failed to realize that I don't have one best friend. In fact, I have more. Best friends, bros, sis's, buddies, HTHT partners, often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. I failed to realize that how much they meant to me also. The friends were there, just that I failed to see that they had been opened doors for me. That's show I gotta treasure them more and move on with my life. Afterall, life was meant to be enjoyed with your beloved ones. And I really appreciate the help that they have lend to me over time and again, listening to my problems, comforting me, trying to lift my spirit up.

Well, here it comes, conclusion. As I am in extreme state of falling into deep slumber, I am not sure whether I am making any sense at all. I have to move on with life. I will survive, I will survive ~ ~ La la la. 

Even though I have moved on, if you ever needed help, you are still welcomed to come find me anytime. Afterall, that's what friends are for. I am sure, pretty sure that you will actually see this post someday, then before going around calling me a retard, weird for posting this kind of post, telling people how disgusted you are with me, or growing hatred towards me, think carefully, have you ever fulfilled your duty as a friend? You didn't, did you?
 

The end~ 

On a side note, congrats to a bro for managing to get into the trip, Awesome Africa. You are so gotta reach the top and bring back the glory and share the glory! :D

And, happy belated independence day Myanmar, I can't wait to come back to you :D See you real soon.

2012, a brand new year, a brand new circle of life

Oh baby you're a firework

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! How's your new year? Interesting? 

I had the loneliest new year ever. Celebrating the new year in the train, along the dark tunnel. Saddest way to start a new year isn't it? 

I was still taking the train from last year and it was already a brand new year when I stepped out of the train. As I move on with my way to meet Daiko friends, I came upon this two men, one Caucasian one Singaporean Chinese, holding hands, in the station. Erm, I went O.O for a moment, then greet happy new year to them out of random. Well, who would know that they would greet back in harmony. Interesting much.

As yours truly stepped out of the station. I was caught up in the human traffic returning home from countdown party. And I swear, the number of people was massive. Old, young, toddlers, animals and many more. Along with others who wanted to go the Flier, we were asked to stop and wait for the human traffic to clear. Damn, wasted 40 minutes waiting until some people confronted with the polices and made their ways despite police warning being molested or touched or whatsoever. I kinda pity the policemen there. They have to work on new year day, controlling high volume of vehicles and human traffic. They also have to tolerate the nonsense of the party goers and annoyed commuters who were trapped in the traffic. Nevertheless, they sure did a fabulous job running everything smoothly. 

And I met a girl (quite chio but slutty) asking me to stay close to her so we can cross the road together. Oh well, I bet she was thinking that I was also going to the party or club or whatsoever, that's why she was being friendly with me. But who knew behind me came four guys, wearing clubbing dress (that's how I describe their attires), and the girl realised that I wasn't going for the party, she just ignored me and ran with the other four guys. Sigh, girls. 

After countless agony of waiting, searching for my friends, I finally met them. Phew, felt so relieved. After spending some times with them, eating carrot as the first meal of the year, Macdonald's ice cream as the dessert of the year, we headed back home, worn and exhausted from last year performance at Bukit Panjang CC, and hard core rehearsals before performance. The whole body was in the state of extreme fatigue. 

An unique way to begin a brand new year isn't it?